How to Be a Good CouchSurfer

I have been a member of CouchSurfing since February 9, 2009.  During that time I have surfed with and hosted many different people.  I have had great experiences and the rare bad experiences, just as I’m sure many others have had.

During the course of my travels and using CouchSurfing, I have come to recognize a few common courtesies guests should extend to their hosts.  There is already a great list of tips for surfers on the CouchSurfing website.  It is very helpful and I think it is a great start.  Some of the more important ones (to me at least) are: Make Plans, Discuss your schedule, Learn your host’s guidelines, and Follow your host’s lead.

While that list is a good start, I think there are a few extra tips one should take into consideration when surfing someone’s couch.

Keep in mind that these are entirely subjective to my own experiences. It’s certainly possible that I’m too much of a control/neat freak and this is over the top.  But from my own encounters with surfers and hosts alike, I give you my own tips for being a good CouchSurfer:

1.  Hygiene

Personal hygiene is a big one for me.  If I am going to invite you into my home, I expect you to have a level of personal hygiene somewhere above none.  Granted, you may not always be able to take a shower or brush your teeth in your host’s home (especially in China).  But if the opportunity presents itself you should take it to wash the dirt and smell of travel off you and your clothes.

I may be a little insensitive here, but personal choice or lifestyle is no excuse to bring all manner of pungent odors into my home.  Just because it’s cool to bathe only once a month back on the hippy commune where you live most of the year isn’t an excuse to sleep on my couch and leave it smelling like a compost heap that’s been sodomized by a hobo.

And you know what else?  I don’t care how “rad” or “gnarly” you think your “dreads” are.  They stink.  And they leave my pillowcases smelling like a rotting rodent carcass.  Wash your hair.

2.  Tidy Up

This is possibly the most important of all surfing tips.  Tidy up after yourself!  This includes while you are actually inside your host’s home and while you are out and about exploring.

While in your host’s home, make sure not to clutter his personal space with your stuff and garbage.  Anything you bring with you that ends up being garbage (snack wrappers, plastic bags, etc), make sure you clean it up right away.  Don’t let it wait until the morning; do it now.  Show a little respect for your host and his home by not making it messy.

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When you go out exploring during the day (or night, as it may be) take all of your belongings and put them as far out of the way as possible.  Sure, you may be doing a yearlong trip around the world and have a HUGE pack, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find some corner to stick it in.  And try not to leave your toiletries or gadgets lying all over the place while they’re charging.

My personal philosophy when surfing with others is to leave as little evidence of me actually being there when I’m out.  I take all my stuff, put it back into my bag and place it somewhere out of sight.  My host is generous enough to give me place to rest my head for free.  The least I can do is not disturb the tranquility of his home by forcing him to navigate around my backpack and avoid my toiletries.

3.  Their Schedule, Not Yours

Even before surfing with someone, make sure that your intended schedule is compatible with his.  It is important to understand that the majority of hosts have lives that involve either work or study.  So if your host needs to be up early, you shouldn’t be coming back in the wee hours of the morning after a good time at the bar.

If you plan on having late nights and your host is totally cool with that, all the better.  But if your host needs his sleep and wakes up early, then you should consider staying elsewhere.

But being clear about your schedule with your host is important if it’s anything out of the ordinary.  If I’m up at 7 AM for work, I don’t want to agree to host you and then find out you won’t be coming back until 4 AM (this has actually happened to me, if you can believe that).

4.  Ask For Their Advice

Even if you don’t want or need it!  Sure, you may have done tons of research before your trip, read your guidebook on the plane, and asked people on the street.  But if you’re staying with someone who actually lives in the place you are visiting, then who else could be a better source of information?

Another great reason to ask your host is to give him a chance to show pride in his home and knowledge of the area.  As an ESL teacher, I find the easiest way to get my students talking is to ask them about themselves or their home.  Well, get your host to talk about his town.

Not only are you showing respect for your host by asking for his advice, but you are also giving him a great opportunity to tell you all his favorite places and maybe even some stuff you won’t find in the guidebooks.  Regardless of whether or not you will heed his advice, it will most certainly give your host a boost of confidence if you ask him for help navigating his town.

So there’s my four additions to CouchSurfing’s already great Tips for Surfers.  I admit that I am a bit of a neat freak, so take this with a grain of salt.  It may be the case that I’m being too controlling or too over-zealous.  But hey, it’s my house and I’ll run it how I damn well please, thank you!  From my own experiences I have cultivated this short list of extra habits I always do when surfing someone’s couch.  And I always appreciate it more when my guests do the same.

One important thing to remember is that if your host has a problem with your behavior in his home, the case may be that he is too shy or too polite to say anything to you about it.  So always be mindful of how your host conducts himself in his house, how he manages his home and his stuff, and try to pay attention to his reactions or attitude when you are in his home.  “A man and his castle” and all that, you know?

And don’t forget, always leave a deserving reference for your host for other potential surfers to see.  In the world of CouchSurfing, references are like currency.  They show your appreciation for your host, and they help out other surfers looking for a place to lay their head at night.

Happy surfing!

Related Posts:

1. CouchSurfing: How Do I Ensure My Safety?
2. CouchSurfing: What’s in it For Me?
3. The Dangers of CouchSurfing